Monday, August 15

Smooth Moves

 I am not a morning person; at all (just ask my brother who used to share a bathroom with me).  I am a snotty little biatch with an extremely short fuse (ugh, yes Mom- even more than usual).  Lucky for all of YOU, I have finally discovered what will make me happy in the morning, and even has me laughing out loud by myself- the kind of laughing where I find myself 'knee slapping' my gear shift on the way to work.  Now Radio (102.3) has Crash and Mars in the morning, an absolutely hilarious duo, who may or may not be an item (it's the never ending mystery), talking about everyday topics with a twist.  I just can't find the words to describe how they run their radio show- solid blogging.

Crash and Mars!

Well anyways, so on Saturday night I was at Hawrelak Park during the Rock and Rock Festival.  While things slowed down for a moment I quickly took a couple minutes to browse through the latest twitter updates.  Yes, I twitter, to confess my love to various celebrities.  Who doesn't?  Low and behold, Crash and Mars were also watching the Rock and Roll! Now sending them a casual tweet saying something like "me too, have fun!" would have been the cool thing to do.

Not this cowgirl.

I was just so excited that I lost all control of my thumbs on my blackberry.  I swear I did not mean to twitter stalk them, it just happened.  Let me break it down for you.

Crash and Mars: At the Edmonton Rocks Festival Hawrelak Park, beauty!! :)
Me:  I can't see you!
Me:  are you watching the hoola hoop girl to the left?? (excuse me, but this chick was not slender, damn near naked, hoola hoopin/ dancing up and down the hill and was seriously unreal at it.  Or just had drunk luck.)
Me:  darn toots I can't find that soul patch anwhere! (At this point I was midway through a very intense man hunt)

Slight break here as I had to replenish the towel rolls in the washrooms.  Did I forget to mention I was the janitor at the event?  How silly of me.  As I try to look as cool and casual as possible while snapping on rubber gloves and grabbing a sopping pile of towel into my hands, I spot a woman who looks just like Mars. Identical.  Except she had some highlights that were throwing me off, so I was not sure if it truly could be her.  Naturally, I stared at her until we made eye contact, then I looked promptly at the serious work I was doing, then back at Mars' twin, eye contact, work, etc.  Then I figured, ah hell with it, and just stared as long as possible, trying to figure out if I should call off my search.  Honestly though, she was staring right back.  Probably thinking, "oh Lord, there's that chick that won't stop tweeting me."

Me: I think I had a showdown in the washroom with you.   You were blonder (maybe) than I thought and thereby stared you down in wonder.
Crash and Mars: don't remember a showdown, if I stared you down it's cause you're super pretty! :)  (K, I swear I didn't make that up to sound awesome, it was said)
Me:  haha I'm too embarrassed to say hi now, after twitter harassing you like a psycho.  (umm as a side note, mentioning you look like a psycho probably just enhances their original judgement of you, not lessens it)
Crash and Mars:  OMG!!! Don't worry about it at all! Lol :)

Ahhh yes, well played.  I could have just ended it there, but no.  I found them.  Actually, they were basically in front of where I had perched myself for the evening, so all I had to do was look up, but in the heat of the moment I panicked and started running around like an ostrich.
For the remainder of the evening I stood behind them.  Not creepily!!! I swear I am not a nutcase, I mean I had to be there for the sake of the washroom cleanliness, they just happened to be nearby and I thought it was cool to see the people that make me die laughing every day. 

I can see you...
Obviously I had been keeping my bestie informed of this entire scenario and she was going mental on the texting, yelling at me to go say hello, introduce myself as the twitter stalker, tell them they are fantastic, get an autograph on my body somewhere, and so on.  I couldn't NOT say hi at this point.  She would never let me live it down- that is just how much we discuss their funny show.  It was like life or death important.  So I swallowed what pride I had left, (there really wasn't much left so it was quite easy) and awkardly approached Mars and said hhhhhhyyyyyyyeeeeeeeeeiiiiiiiiiiiiiii. 

She called Crash on over to join us and we chatted like old pals for at least three minutes!  They were just so darn friendly.  I apologized for acting like a crazy person, laughed, and said "ah well I don't feel too bad - you guys probably get that all time!"
They look at each other.
Burst out laughing.
They had never been hunted down before. 
And will probably never announce their location again.


Anonymous said...

Crash and mars are engaged!

kents said...

You are too much Lauren! I never thought of you as 'shy'

Anonymous said...

you are nuts.. this is funny though


Anonymous said...

This is why we are best friends. I still cannot believe you didn't get an autograph.

Anonymous said...

Ok you are officially a nut case.


Lauren Kent

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